Over the last few weeks I have posted less and less on my blog. I have been spending just a little bit of time trying to figure out why. Is it that I have nothing to say? Is it that I don't have any time? Is it that what I say will have no profound effect on anyone? Why does that matter? Shouldn't my blog be about me anyway? As you can see a myriad of questions popping up left and right. Either way here is what I am going to do.
I am going to continue to post, but I am going to get back to my original formula 0f sharing my heart and asking tough questions. The reason is, I often realize I have lots of things in my mind and heart I need to put down. All of you folks will only be fortunate enough to read it - if you so choose and respond if you feel a need. So that is where this will lead - I have some things on my heart that I will share but right now I will start with this:
On my heart lately has been the thought that we are inept. It's true. I have thought about it from this standpoint:
Will God get over us? I mean really - is it possible for him to feel about us like he did the Israelites.
I find my self in sadness over the fact that our world looks like this:
Hosea 5:1-5
1 "Hear this, you priests!
Pay attention, you Israelites!
Listen, O royal house!
This judgment is against you:
You have been a snare at Mizpah,
a net spread out on Tabor.
2 The rebels are deep in slaughter.
I will discipline all of them.
3 I know all about Ephraim;
Israel is not hidden from me.
Ephraim, you have now turned to prostitution;
Israel is corrupt.
4 "Their deeds do not permit them
to return to their God.
A spirit of prostitution is in their heart;
they do not acknowledge the LORD.
5 Israel’s arrogance testifies against them;
the Israelites, even Ephraim, stumble in their sin;
Judah also stumbles with them.
Is that what we have come to? Is it just me or do our churches not look much different?
I have found myself in prayer that this is not the case:
Hosea 5:6-11
6 When they go with their flocks and herds
to seek the LORD,
they will not find him;
he has withdrawn himself from them.
7 They are unfaithful to the LORD;
they give birth to illegitimate children.
Now their New Moon festivals
will devour them and their fields.
8 "Sound the trumpet in Gibeah,
the horn in Ramah.
Raise the battle cry in Beth Aven£;
lead on, O Benjamin.
9 Ephraim will be laid waste
on the day of reckoning.
Among the tribes of Israel
I proclaim what is certain.
10 Judah’s leaders are like those
who move boundary stones.
I will pour out my wrath on them
like a flood of water.
11 Ephraim is oppressed,
trampled in judgment,
intent on pursuing idols.£
I fear this what we have become - trying to serve an awesome God who is growing angry and weary of us...
I am examining so many things in my own heart right now, so much of what I have been taught. A gospel that is self serving and really doesn't separate us from the world. Yet Jesus life and teaching was so revolutionary. I have been praying a lot about how this is all presented to our teens. And I feel bad for so many of them who attend MCS, because I know what they are being taught and how it is being presented and then they come and are a part of what I am teaching - and I know these things have to conflict for them so much.
The main question I am asking is: Is Jesus truly the focal point of all of our teaching and everything we do?I feel like we have watered things down in so many ways that we have sort of allowed Jesus to wait until the invitation to get his mention. I'm not talking about presenting things in a positive relevant way, I am talking about centering everything on Jesus. In my opinion, I think a lot of our churches aren't growing because people are over the health and wealth and just want to be led to a loving, caring, radical savior who loved people enough to buck the norm.
The other problem - we don't live and follow that Jesus. We follow the very nicley placed in my pocket and he's there when I need him Jesus who gave up his life
just for me and I serve him on Sundays when I show up to punch my ticket and didn't you know I have no problems and that everything in my world is perfect and I would never share any real problems with you cause what would you think of me?
And here I am,
guilty as charged...
I don't want to serve that Jesus anymore - I want to serve the Jesus that was honest, open, focused on the big picture, didn't care if you were offended by his meesage, loved everyone because he is everyone's savior, Not just mine.
Father, break the old Jesus out of me - the untrue Jesus - Make me like your real Son. I am not worthy to be called a child of God, but I want to be like your Son if you will allow me. May I truly die to myself and become what He has called me to be = His hands, and His feet in the truest form. Not in my perfectly translated, just has to be this or that way form. But His! May you break our churches - all of them - remake them into something that Jesus would want to associate with as His true bride. I love you. Amen.
I have a
huge announcement to make....
The news I am about to share will impact everything I know as life and what it means to me. ...
This news is life changing, I may never be the same....
My family will be forever affected by this news as it will really change our lives forever...
It is an exciting moment in many ways...
I know that God is going to bless us because of it...
I cannot begin to tell you how happy this makes me...
Hayden went poopie in the potty...I know, I know - you're thinking all of that fanfare for that...Oh let me just say this is a huge deal for us...
This means we could begin to train Hayden to do her poopies on the potty from now on..
Hayden is only fourteen months old...it means she could be the smartest child in the universe( Hey, I can embellish my own child, can't I?)
It means the cost of diapers goes down drastically and more quickly.
It means that Daddy doesn't have to brave the land of bbbllllluuuoooooggggghhhhhhhhhhh diapers anymore - I think I can handle maybe teaching the old wipe technique...
This is awesome. I am so happy. My daughter is awesome.
In other news, please pray for me as God seems to be doing something in my life at this time. I can't say what it is, but it will definitely impact my family. God bless you in your walk with Him today!!
I am definitely feeling a nasty headache from a really nice catch in my back right now. I hate it. I get these muscles in my back from time to time that just knot up and hurt. Every doctor I have been to says that I wear my stress on my body. Well right now my body is taking it pretty seriously.
I find myself always talking about how I have a lot going on right now, which is always true and I never feel like I have downtime, it goes back to the issue of giving myself time to relax and do nothing rather than just taking on too much. It sounds so easy. Last week Susan, Hayden and I left town headed for Tampa, to spend time with our families. For the first time ever I actually went down there and did nothing, OK not actually nothing we did a lot...we attended two worship services on the Sunday we were there, one of which I preached, drove hundreds of miles, seeing all of our friends, basically we ran around like chickens with our heads cut off. I think it would suffice to say we were as busy there as we typically are at home, just with different things. I got home only to have a lot to do. I think that is the problem with leaving town. When you get home you still have a ton of work, actually twice as much. What relief of stress is that? Anyway.
Yesterday was actually a good catch up day, I really felt good getting back in to the swing. I have declared a new schedule for myself although it may change as I work out the bugs, but we'll see:
Monday: Administrative day
Tuesday: Off
Wednesday: People Day
Thursday: People Day
Friday: People Day
Saturday: Family Day
Sunday: Lord, Help me.
That is the way it is looking right now, I have never actually taken that day off before, so today is the first time. My wife has loaded me up with "Honey Do's" I am so pumped! As I thought through this and prayed about it I came up with this because I have been asking God to help me better use my time that I can be more about Kingdom business. That means no more admin during the week (Okay, I know that isn't totally realistic, but I am going to try)
Last Friday, in the car driving home from Tampa, sleeping baby, I had a revelation while talking to my wife. I guess it isn't a real revelation, because I knew it. But I guess it was just one of those; my wife is the smartest woman alive moments, because she got me to realize something so important about what I do. I 've known this little factoid and you've heard it too:
"People are LOST - that means they are going to die in hell. These are people that God has given you the opportunity to touch and your purpose is to love them, and allow them to meet Him. Because you are SAVED."
I feel like I have been on this journey to PurposeLand lately, and slowly I am pulling into the parking lot. I hope to get on some of the big rides soon, but I am sure that for a while I will hang around in KiddyKingdom until I really begin to see God's bigger picuture for me in the largest and truest since. I pray that in time I will, I know he'll be ready to show me...
Yes that's right in the big metroplex known as Mobile, Mardi Gras has been underway for as long as folks here can stretch at least since January. Anyway, as has become customary for the CEO and I - that's Susan and I, we are heading out of town for the week next week. I probably won't blog much during that time. So this is for all of my faithful readers - right, how could I be so presumptious - whatever. Blessings to you and yours!
Chris
I am asking myself this question because in my life over the last few months I am realizing more and more that I do not take enough time for my family and personal life. I have had many discussions with lots of people in the last few months about this issue. Ultimately though I think
BST got me going this morning.
I have spoken with my wife about these issues:
"Do I spend enough time focusing on my family? How can I be better involved in the daily household activities? Do I spend enough time with my daughter? Have I allowed myself to be consumed by what is going on around me?" These are just a few of her questions.
Speaking with my Dad who grew up in a very conservative wing of the church of Christ:
"Do you feel appreciated for what you are doing? Are you feeling overstressed?"
Speaking with a brother and fellow ministry friend:
"Are you giving up too much for the people who really don't think about your home life and family? Have you been sacrificing yourself on the altar of forsaking the family? Are you sacrificing your marriage for ministry?"
Obviously, I have really struggled with this stuff and have talked at length with many people about it.
But I think the one question that got me thinking the most was this one: "Are you serving the church because it's a job you're addicted to, or because it's your God that your addicted to?"
That could be the most pointed question about this whole thing. Why do you do it? Is it a job or is it your personal offering to God? And to that end I ask myself this...If I say no to someone, am I being selfish or unloving to them and does that reflect on my love for God? This to me is a huge struggle, I think mostly because I know I love God, and I know that part of showing Him love is serving others, but not just that but loving people. I love people as well. (I feel like Goldmember here, "I lowve Gooooolllllldddd.") Seriously, I really want to serve others and love others.
The still remaining question is, when to say when? When is it OK to say no, I know so many people who deal with this very issue. It isn't just in ministry, it is everywhere. Is this a bigger issue that has more to do with not compartmentalizing Christ? I am not sure, I would like to believe living a life like Christ's is a goal for me each day, and I live to sacrifice my entire life to him. This reminds me of the skit that Randy Gill did at Zoe, "The One More Thing Ministry" where what we all need is just "one more thing" These questions remain as I don't have all the answers. I pray in time I will.
