My family and I are doing really well since the storm. We decided to weather it out (won't do that again) and try to be here for the immediate clean-up and inventory that one would come to expect living in L.A. Things are OK.
I really should be ecstatic right now, but I'm not. Tomorrow my in-laws load up and head this way to do what my father-in-law seems to do best help folks in need. He'll be coming to patch our roof and fix our fence and blah, blah, blah.
In all honesty I feel horrible right now. I have been hearing in my mind all that song by Acapella, "That Could've Been Me." After everything we have seen or heard over the last few days I feel like I didn't even deserve to have a house, with electricity and plush cable internet to live in and use. I actually feel like I should be homeless too. I am thankful that I have a home, because my baby girl has place to sleep.
OH MY HEART JUST HURTS THINKING OF WHAT IT WOULD BE LIKE TO NOT HAVE A HOUSE FOR MY FAMILY TO LIVE IN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Some have said, "it could've been worse = at least you're still alive." YEAH! Well whatever, the people who say that are the ones who didn't lose their homes and jobs and well lives! What about the ones who did?
See, this is what it all comes down to, This is what I have been reduced to.
I am dealing with some hard emotions right now, because I hurt for my friends
JD and Steve Martin. And so many others through MS and LA.
I feel like it should've been me.
More later...maybe....
k2 said...
k2 said...
(why don't i proof this before i post it?)
i'm right there with you, brother. i'm sitting here in my hotel, and i am feeling more guilty than you can believe. jd ... does he have a house still? d1 and our daughter stayed with bill and dollee. the roof got damaged, and bill and his neighbor went out in the rain to fix it. i'm sitting in a hotel, no rain, the power and phone are still working, everything working, and y'all stayed there to make sure things are alright.
i'm sitting in class trying to pay attention, and stay on topic while thoughts of new orleans, and the coast go through my mind.
may God forgive me for not being there!
Donna G said...
Don't beat yourself up with the guilt. God left you with what you have where you will be able to reach out and help John & Steve. Just imagine how much it would mean to you to have people wanting to help YOU if it were YOU!!
We are all dealing with the helpless feeling of not knowing what to do...God will make that clear too! We have to be strong, emotionally and physically for those who need us now!
I am grateful that you and yours are safe.
Jason Retherford said...
CL,
Good to hear from you brother. My heart hurts too for those we know and care about in the Gulf Coast.
I know I don't live in the area affected by Katrina, but I still can't help but share a little sentiment: why others and not us?
God isn't to big for our questions.
Malia said...
I so glad that you guys are alright, I was quite worried and kept checking for a new post! My mom let me know that ya'll had stayed there and were doing okay. Good ole George coming to lend a helping hand :-)
We are praying and trying to help the best we can.
Love to you and Susan and Hayden!
Niki said...
Hi Chris!
I echo your thoughts and those of the other comments. We are blessed to have what we do and we need to be thankful and not shamed by it.
The small blogworld continues...do you mean Steve Martin of Ocean Springs, MS? I just blogged about them a few days ago. We met them at the Youth Specialties Conference in St. Louis in 2003. We were really worried about them too. We emailed them and thankfully Steve got back to us to let us know they were o.k. Still waiting to hear how we can help them out, where to send money, etc.
I just want to thank you for sharing your heart in your posts. I'll be praying for God to calm your spirit and to provide for your family's needs. God bless you!